I’ve coined a new phrase for these times living under Covid 19. Hollow days. I figure for most of us there are three kinds of days, good days when we are feeling hopeful, bad days when we want to hide under the duvet and cry, and hollow days.
Hollow days are the ones where you see the good in the world, you see the bad in the world and they just seem to cancel each other out leaving you feeling empty, hollow.
It’s a difficult one because it’s very much a symptom of the life we are living at the moment and, talking to friends, it seems to be a growing feeling.
Perhaps part of it is lockdown fatigue. We’ve been like a plane stuck in a holding pattern for weeks. Possibly it’s what people used to call ennui. The Dictionary defines it as a feeling of listlessness arising from a lack of occupation or excitement. A sort of active boredom.
It is a feeling that could sweep us up and become a new normal if we are not careful. There are ways to control it however they will be different for each of us. I find prayer helps, it connects me with something else, something bigger than me. It also takes me outside myself. Reading the Psalms is also helping. I think part of the problem is there is no outlet for our feelings of joy or anger. Zoom isn’t enough when you want to have a beer and rant about the family driving you mad. Facebook Messenger can’t give you a hug from your mum on a bad day. Skype is no way to celebrate your birthday with friends. Psalms remind us that we can share our joy with God but they also remind us God is okay with us shouting and screaming at Him. He is big enough to listen to our misery and anger and despair. And He can take those burdens from us and heal us from them.
We are living in difficult times and we need to look after ourselves. It is okay to be not okay but when you find yourself having a day like that, be kind to yourself.